Though I saw it all around
Never thought I could be affected
Thought that we'd be the last to go
It is so strange the way things turn

Saturday, October 24, 2009

WIP II

Chapter 28 done while being somewhat sociable. It came in at 1540 words bringing our total to 48791. A can of whoop-ass has been opened. It's just down to who will be whacked and who will be standing.
"That's not so much what I want at this moment."

"Trust me," Doru said. "This is exactly what you need."

After another two glasses and a memory rainfall through which Doru stoically waded, he helped me to bed. I know I dreamed, but like leaves through the rain I only remembered the blackness of sleep. Glorious deep velvet temporary forgetfulness.

I woke to Doru's knocking on my door. The sun hadn't risen. A moment of disorientation as the dream faded across the synapses and then I became shocklingly awake. "Are you alive?" he asked through the door. "It's six o'clock."

Yeah, I use "rain" twice to close together. I'll get that in the rewrite.

2 comments:

ChiaLynn said...

I assumed the rainfall/rain bit was intentional. I kinda like it.

Steve Buchheit said...

Chia... yeah, that's what I was going for... :)

I sometimes do that, this one was unconscious. And in a quick reread last night it stuck out as something I would flag to look at.