I watch the ripples change their size
But never leave the stream
Of warm impermanence
And so the days float through my eyes
But still the days seem the same
And these children that you spit on
As they try to change their worlds
Are immune to your consultations
They're quite aware of what they're goin' through

Saturday, October 25, 2008

Writing Fail

Okay, so, I built myself up for this weekend, and piled on the expectations, and now that I'm having difficulty becoming engaged in my novel again, I'm experiencing massive fail feelings. I think I set myself up for that.

The company is fun, the place excellent, the conversation good, but I feel like I'm avoiding writing. Now, I have produced some 3000 words so far this weekend, but that feels so small. I'm looking for distraction when I should be linking back into writing. I'm doing a lot of butt-in-chair-hands-on-keyboard time, but not a lot of typing out fiction.

I've done other things. Heck, I even took a nap. I don't take naps (although I haven't sleep well the past three nights). Distraction seeking, it's the new cat waxing.

I think what I really need is a more calm day-to-day life. But that isn't going to happen. I haven't done much work in the back yard this year, and I need to get stuff done. I tried cutting out the freelance and now I'm having the most work of any year to date. Council continues to be a struggle and is taking way too much energy.

And here I am complaining again.

No comments: