Novel Up, the new catch-phrase

So, this guy in the writers group I belong to sent this email out with this subject line. He was saying that he had uploaded his fresh novel to our site and we all should go read it, but it got me to thinking. Sure, the novel is up, go get it. Kind of like "Batter Up!" (pictures in my mind of little league, playing outfield on the dusty fields of Gibbsboro, NJ, singing, "hey, batter, batter, swing, batter, batter, SWING!" - hey , Rog, thinking about you right this minute)

Then there's also the version of "Lawyer Up." I think I've done that already, or do I need to post another picture of my bookshelves to prove it? Yes, I've got more books to read that I have time (typed that first, "life left" but figured that was too pessimistic). I've got lots o' books, and I want lots more. There's the new Elric novel, Jim Hines is pushing out books and I'm falling behind, Glen Cook has both reprints and new stuff, and then Steven Brust will have a new one soon as well. Heck, I may have to get fired from the day thing to just get caught up.

I'm going to take it as a mantra, though. Novel Up. As in "Cowboy Up." Maybe put that on tape on the front of my notebook. Time to Novel Up. Put your big-boy pants on and saddle up (there's another version) to the keyboard and just friggin' type the thing.

At first I thought it was the crazy schedule that knocked me out of writing, and it probably was. But I think I have a handle on that, and the day job has cut back a lot (yes, there's still overtime, but not stupid overtime). The night thing has calmed down (I think, I still have my suspicions about long simmering issues and under-currents) to a manageable fire drill (there' still outstanding issues, but I think I'm in front of the ball now). The freelance stuff I need to get working on, but that's also manageable (for the moment). Early this year I think it was the depression and my not being willing to face the gremlins one more time during the day. Now it's the fear. The fear that I'm wasting time, or won't be good, or just won't be able to pull it off. I will face my fears (I have before). "Fear is the mind killer..." (sure, it's cliche and Herbert over uses it, but it's still true).

I've pulled out my stories that I need to edit, and I look at them, and they stare me down. I would just let them be, but I think there's some gold in that pile. Maybe I need to start with the small "Interview" (need better title, first edit). It's less than 1K words. I can do that.

So, time to Novel Up. All you all (or most of you all) are doing it. Maybe this is just me in my little-boy pants running after the crowd yelling, "Wait up, guys, come on, wait up."

edit I have been writing this post on and off since this morning, I've just re-edited the previous paragraph, and here are my thoughts about it... But I've wanted to do this, I need to do this. This is just part of the fear, the gremlins getting more clever with their cutting remarks. They're saying, "why do you want this, is this just about ego, about wanting fame, about being better, about belonging." No, damn it, this is because the story will kill me if I don't get it out. This is a part of ending the "destructive behavior." Glad you could be along for it.

Novel Up, Buchheit. Time to get it going.