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Monday, March 5, 2012

Dear Rush Limbaugh,

Let me say first off that you can ignore me. I'm not a normal listener to your show. Mostly because I like to keep my intelligence intact and just a random sampling of your show and your viewers proves that would be impossible to do if I listened. But I do hear about your controversies, which seem to happen on a regular basis of about one every year and a half. You have a propensity for sticking your foot in your mouth, which is, I guess, better than the alternatives places you could be sticking either.

So take that into mind as I call you a despicable excuse for a bag of protoplasm to retain fetid water. You're not a poor excuse for a human being, you're a poor excuse for excrement. To call you a disgrace to thinking animals above the level of chameleons… whom I would rather spend time with instead of you, I'm sure our conversations would be more productive. The chameleon and me. I felt I needed to clarify that for you. Anyway, it would be an insult to the intelligence of chameleons everywhere to say that.

You called Sandra Fluke not only a slut, but a prostitute and someone who is only in school to have sex. And then you tried to apologize several times. But those weren't really apologies, and you're insulting our intelligence by trying to get us to think so.

And then you go on to say how you're the victim. You're only the victim of your own depraved mind. You're a sick, sexually obsessed, dirty old man. Saying you're sorry you used the words "slut" and "prostitute" but not the sentiment behind your slanderous statements. You stated that this student was having too much sex to pay for her own birth control. That she was doing it for money and wanted us to pay for it. And then you said that "we the people" should get the benefit of it by having her post web videos of her having sex.

Let me just say this for every woman I know, including my nieces who are still in college, you're whole commentary was an exposure of your depraved attitude towards women and your sense of entitlement. And I'm forced to ask, do you often watch sex videos on the internet? I'm just wondering because of how fast you got to that statement. Like you were building to something and needed the visual to finish. That any woman would want to be near you is an example of how messed up our society is. Frankly, I'm almost moved to get a restraining order against you on behalf of all women.

To say your mind is filled with more unwashed socks than the Grinch is to slander Dr. Suess, so I won't. But I will say your soul is full of gunk. Frankly I'm not sure that you don't leave a slime trail behind you like the bloated slug you resemble. That anyone would listen to your show and find it entertaining is an indictment on the modern education process.

So let me ask this. You're an "entertainer" and it's pretty obvious the only reason your "apologizing" is that 10 sponsors have pulled the plug. So you do it for the money. And I think you try to make the people who listen to you happy. So what does that make you? I'll leave you to your own logic.

You make me long for the olden days. Your olden days of puritainical rule and sensibilities. I would make the trip to Florida to throw rotten food at you in the pillories.

Pond scum feels sullied by the comparison to you. You're not an entertainer, your the neighborhood homeless guy on the corner shouting obscenities at the people in their cars. That you somehow duped people into giving you a radio show so you could spread your disease to more people is beyond my comprehension. I'm sure it involved drugs. The kind you used to take.

With all due respect, fuck off and die.

Yours,
Me

PS. I'll preemptively apologize. Some of my word choices weren't the most appropriate, and in my attempt to convey my point, I may have offended you. I sincerely apologies from the bottom of your black heart.

See how that doesn't work.

That I wasted my evening writing this scrib instead of study for my test on Wednesday can give you a measure of how much I'm pissed at this whole thing.

EDITED 03-06-11 I think what really gets to me is the pernicious mentality of social conservatives who ascribe to the old definition, "Conservatism: The fear that someone, somewhere, is having a good time."

And the mind set is very well portrayed in this youtube clip


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