And they come with no warning,
nature loves her little surprises.
Continual crisis!

Tuesday, December 4, 2007

Scientist Report Slight Earth Orbital Anomaly!

World scientists are very concerned over new evidence that the Earth has developed an anomaly in it's orbit. Planetologists are agreed that this slight wobble is being created by the giant gyroscope effect from all the spin the Bush Administration is doing to paint the NIE (National Intelligence Estimate) that says Iran abandoned their nuclear weapon programs back in 2003 as Good News(tm) and a justification for their past actions and for justifying continued belligerence against Iran.

"If this keeps up," says Fran Helprot, Doctor of World Spinning, Geneva University, "the Earth may soon leave it's standard orbital track and begin circling the Sun in a mobious type track."

More as it comes in.


Dan Berlyoung said...

Hat's off to you, Mr. B. You had me going.

It was pretty painful watching ole' 'dubya trying not to twist in on himself while he lied through his teeth and everyone knew it.

There's no place like next November, there's no place like next November...

Steve Buchheit said...

Yep, Dan, you could almost smell the burning transmission oil as he kept shifting gears during that press conference and lugging out. I wonder how soon we'll hear about a mysterious bump in the small of his back and Dick Cheney needing to go in for new batteries in his "pace maker."

Todd Wheeler said...

When I saw the headline in the newspaper about the report, I thought "Really? What change in direction for the administration."

And then I read the article. Not much left to pin on Iran; maybe they'll try to blame global warming on them. Not that it really exists mind you. ;-)

Steve Buchheit said...

Todd, exactly.

What I'm really waiting for, now that some reporters have done the research on the history to find out that in 2003 (when Iran "suspended" nuclear weapon research) that there were no sanctions on Iran, is for the Bush people to say about how this is why they invade Iraq, or military actoin showed we were going to be tough and Iran complied with our unspoken wishes just from that threat. Or that intelligence was wrong about WMDs in Iraq, that they're probably wrong about no nucs in Iran (won't *that* be a fun time in DC).

Jim Wright said...

The first two lines had me going, Steve, you bastard.

I'm not even going to commend on this one, mostly because I can't of anything suitably sarcastic enough.

Steve Buchheit said...

JIm, no worries, that's why we're here. Feel free to use the joke on others.