I watch the ripples change their size
But never leave the stream
Of warm impermanence
And so the days float through my eyes
But still the days seem the same
And these children that you spit on
As they try to change their worlds
Are immune to your consultations
They're quite aware of what they're goin' through

Friday, December 4, 2009

Updatery

Okay, I've taken off the word verify/captcha thing, but have limited commenting to the past three days of posts. If you see something from before then that you absolutely need to comment on, it will go into moderation. I'll try not to be too slovenly to not get around to moving comments out of moderation quickly. If it must get out now, you can comment on the latest post. Just make sure you reference the post you're talking about, please.

On other things, I'm going to reduce my intake of Wellbutrin for a week, and then stop taking it. After almost two years on it, I think it's time to move off. It was only supposed to be a temporary thing anyway (and two years stretches the definition of "temporary"). Last night I had the wind taken out of my sails (no I don't wish to discuss it here) and seriously reconsidered my position, but then I figured there would always be a reason to keep on it.

Now, I should say here, my move is not for everybody. When I started on I was drifting back into big D way too often and the world was going to 50% black all the time. Living without emotions may have been good for Vulcans, but it sucks for humans (and really, if you actually look at the Science Fictional lives of Vulcans, they aren't very good at masking their emotions let alone removing them entirely). The big D hasn't been knocking at the door lately (at least not that I recognize). I have been beating myself up pretty good lately, but that's normal for Fall (as well as finishing the novel).

So, forward into reverse. Or something like that.

3 comments:

vince said...

Having been on Zoloft for a period of time in my life, I understand. I was happy to finally ease off it, and when to do so was my decision. I also have friends with the big D that fight it every day, so I have a lot of empathy there.

And no, I wouldn't want to live without emotions, even though there are days that they suck.

Anyway best of luck with everything going on.

Rick said...

Hang tough there, Steve. Remember, there's always 2010 Conclave to look forward to. Did William mention to you we were forming a Midwest Genre Writers and Readers Group? You'll have to join, you know.

Steve Buchheit said...

Vince, exactly. That's why when I felt that big D creeping back into my head, I talked to my doctor about it. I lived that way for at least two years once. I never want to experience that again.

Thank, Rick. Nope, I haven't heard anything from that certain William. Hopefully he'll be at Confusion this year. Will you? Now, if we have meetings for the MwGWRG in Detroit, I may be a little scarce at the functions (it being a 4-6 hour drive). Although I'm willing to be there in spirit, and catch up on the minutes over the occasional lunch or dinner.